The Eclectic Company: Big Tree Humor

* "Don't tell me the sky's the limit when there are footprints on the moon!"

* "Those who throw dirt only lose ground."

* "I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger."

* "The road to success is always under construction."

* "I fish, therefore I lie."

* "Dear Algebra, stop asking us to find your X, she's not coming back and I know Y."

* "Teamwork means never having to take all the blame."

* "I barely survived yesterday and now it's already today!"

* "Do you call Santa's helpers subordinate clauses?"

* "So, how many days DID it take to build Rome?"

* "Cancel my subscription, I'm tired of your issues."

* "Today is the tomorrow we worried about yesterday."

* "Don't sweat petty things . . . or pet sweaty things"

* "Two wrongs are only the beginning"

* "Worrying works. 90% of the things I worry about never happen."

* "I finally got my head together, and now my body is falling apart."

* "When I'm finally holding all the cards, why does everyone decide to play chess?"

* "Legend: A lie that has the dignity of age."

* "A diamond is forever: The payments are longer."

* "When in doubt, mumble: When in trouble, delegate: When in charge, ponder."

* "I don't have an attitude; I have a personality you can't handle."

* "When I want your opinion, I'll give it to you!"

* "It is better to understand a little than to misunderstand a lot."

* "An eye for an eye leaves the world blind."

* "Sports do not build character, they reveal it!"

* "Dust is a protective coating for fine furniture"

* "I'm in shape - round IS a shape."

* "Money talks, but all mine says is "good-bye."

* "If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?"

* "Love is blind but marriage is a real eye-opener!"

* "A dog has an owner. A cat has a staff"

* "I'd like to have more self-esteem, but I don't deserve it!"

* "Red meat is not bad for you. Fuzzy green meat is."

* "Nothing is fool proof to a talented fool."

* "Bacteria - the back door of a cafeteria."

* "Nostalgia isn't what it used to be."

* "Stressed spelled backwards is desserts."

* "As I said before, I never repeat myself."

* "Corduroy pillows: they're making headlines!"

* "Young at heart, slightly older in other places."

* "(I'm) proof that evolution can go in reverse"

* "My reality check bounced"

* "If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn?"

* "I hate people who steal my ideas before I think of them."

* "I was uncool before uncool was cool."

* "Middle age: When your age starts to show around your middle"

* "Do not disturb, I'm already disturbed."

* "If an open door is ajar, is an open jar adoor?"

* "March Madness takes its toll. Please have exact change."

* "Telepath Wanted: You know where to apply!"

* "The information went data way"

* "I'm bilingual - I speak English and SMACK!"

* "Mental floss prevents moral decay."

* "Why use a big word when a diminutive one will do?"

* "Why is abbreviation such a long word?"

* "I can see clearly now, the brain is gone."

* "Every morning is the dawn of a new error"

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Quotes of Note

You're born a male but you have to CHOOSE to be a man" - Herm Edwards

"I mourn the loss of thousands of precious lives, but I will not rejoice in the death of one, not even an enemy. Returning hate for hate multiplies hate, adding deeper darkness to a night already devoid of stars. Darkness cannot drive out darkness: only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate: only love can do that" - Unknown

"They err who think Santa Clause comes down through the chimney; he really enters through the heart." - Mrs. Paul M. Ell

"Thankfully, our true roots are in heritage and not things. I just need to keep reminding myself that things are only reminders of heritage." - Keetha Broyles, June 21, 2010

"Tears lubricate the soul." - from "Finding Buck McHenry"

"Somehow you must come to understand that God is love, that love is the proof of God, and forgiveness is the proof of love." - The Priest in "Levi's Will" by W. Dale Cramer

"The truth about a man is in what he does, not what he says." - W. Dale Cramer in "Levi's Will"

"Fairy Tales are more than true; not because they tell us that dragons exist, but because they tell us that dragons can be beaten." - G. K. Chesterton

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Thursday, April 14, 2011

Big Tree Humor

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Once upon a time, a long long time ago, when I was a mere 18 year old child, I took the trip of a lifetime to Africa.

I was one of a group of 16, African novices all. Each day was filled with sights, sounds, and scents which none of us had ever encountered before.

One of our stops was to visit Victoria Falls. We pulled into a parking lot on the Rhodesian side of the falls, which of course is now Zimbabwe.

There before us was a huge baobab tree.

None of us KNEW it was a baobab tree. All we knew was that we had never seen anything like it and were amazed at its gnarled huge trunk!

We sat there with our mouths agape wondering what in the world it was until some one of us, one with eagle eyes, spotted a small identifying sign at the base of the tree.

We leapt from the van and rushed over to read the sign.

This is what it said:

Ya think????

Photo Credits:
Baobab Tree - daveandlolo
Big Tree sign - thepinkpeonyoflejardin.blogspot.com

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7 comments:

Doris Sturm said...: How interesting - you went to Africa? I've always wanted to go and never will, but that is funny - thank God for that sign or else you'd never have guessed it was a big tree, right? LOL; April 14, 2011 at 12:56 PM
Cheeseboy said...: Wow. You have had quite the adventures. That looks a lot like the Tree of Life at Animal kingdom at Disneyworld.; April 14, 2011 at 2:25 PM
Anonymous said...: I love it and how lucky you were to get to see it
my hailey would love climbing that one
i love trees; April 14, 2011 at 3:29 PM
Linda @ A La Carte said...: That is so funny! Keetha what a wonderful trip! I bet you have great memories including the 'Big Tree'~~

hugs, Linda; April 14, 2011 at 4:06 PM
Kristin - The Goat said...: Ha Ha!! That's great, truly great. Thank you!!; April 14, 2011 at 8:41 PM
Jojo said...: Seriously??????; April 14, 2011 at 8:47 PM
Debby@Just Breathe said...: Really? That is so funny. I like your new header photo.; April 16, 2011 at 11:47 AM